Keir Starmer’s plan to ban social media ads for small boat crossings, tucked into the Border Security, Asylum and Immigration Bill, is a flimsy gesture against a tide of 43,309 Channel crossings in the year to June 2025—a 38% surge, per Home Office figures. With 70% of Britons calling immigration “too high” and 43% deeming it “mostly bad” (YouGov, July 2025), Starmer’s digital fix is a PR stunt, not a solution. His -44 approval rating and Reform UK’s 29% polling spike (YouGov, July 2025) signal a public fed up with his deafness to their calls for secure borders. Feniks Knows Best: communities, not Whitehall’s half-measures, hold the key to sovereignty. Socrates would ask: does banning ads stop smugglers, or just polish Starmer’s image? This is bureaucratic fluff, not leadership.
Dinghies Keep Docking: A Satirical Skewering
Oh, Starmer’s Grand Plan for the Boats
Oh, Keir, with specs and lawyer’s flair,
You’ve banned boat ads to clear the air.
No X posts now, no smuggler’s call—
You’ve “smashed” the gangs, or so you bawl.
Yet still the dinghies come, my dear,
Through Channel fog, they glide with cheer.
Forty-three thousand, Home Office counts,
Crossed in a year, in swelling amounts.
Your £150 million, bold and grand,
Chases pixels across the land.
Yet still the dinghies come, my dear,
While voters’ tempers flare and sear.
YouGov reveals a public scorned:
Seven in ten wish borders warned.
Your ad ban’s neat, a Whitehall ploy,
But boats keep coming, to our joy.
Yet still the dinghies come, my dear,
No fix in sight, just spin and leer. S
ocrates would prod, with knowing smirk,
“Where’s the plan, Keir? Where’s the work?”
Communities could guard our shore,
Not globalist dreams that voters deplore.
Your scheme’s a farce, a British jest,
A stiff upper lip, ignoring the rest.
Yet still the dinghies come, my dear,
Till you heed the street, not Brussels’ cheer.
Deaf to the Nation: Starmer’s Border Blunder
Starmer’s social media ad ban is a masterclass in dodging the real issue, deaf to a public demanding border control. Home Office data confirms 43,309 crossings in the year to June 2025, yet Starmer fiddles with digital distractions while 70% of Britons call immigration “too high” and 43% see it as “mostly bad” (YouGov, July 2025). His -44 approval rating and Reform UK’s 29% polling surge reflect a nation exasperated by his inaction. Feniks Knows Best: empower communities, not tech bureaucrats, to secure borders. Starmer’s refusal to hear the public’s roar—evident in rally chants for “secure borders”—threatens his legitimacy. Ditch the spin and face the crisis. Call to Action: Hit X and tell Starmer: stop the boats or lose the votes? Tag #FeniksKnowsBest and demand action!
Source Check: The Facts Behind the Farce
- Home Office. (2025). Irregular Migration to the UK, Year Ending June 2025. Retrieved from gov.uk [Accessed August 4, 2025]. (Source for 43,309 crossings and 38% surge.)
- YouGov. (July 2025). Immigration and Asylum Tracker. Retrieved from yougov.co.uk [Accessed August 4, 2025]. (Source for 70% “too high,” 43% “mostly bad,” -44 approval rating, and Reform UK’s 29% polling.)
- UK Government. (2025). Border Security, Asylum and Immigration Bill. Retrieved from gov.uk [Accessed August 4, 2025]. (Source for ad ban policy and £150 million funding.)